Whoops and coughs, then hot tears of joy … Henry Dides watches the Minister of Health cry live

Gwyneth at the 1999 Oscars. Gazza at Italia 90. To that list of wobbly lip pomades, we can now add the name Matthew Hancock.

With the arrival of the coronavirus vaccine, the Minister of Health was on Good Morning Britain yesterday to see the first vaccinations take place live.

Of course it was!

Mister Hancock, as we know, doesn’t do as many milks as he squeezes out from every last drop. Do you remember his performance at the Downing Street press conference in May when he hit his goal of 100,000 tests per day? It was like watching an old pork take its final call.

Whoop, cough, frosty imprint. He then wipes those eyes aggressively before reopening them in front of his fans.

Yesterday’s play took place when an 81-year-old man became the second British patient to be vaccinated, in a hospital in Warwickshire. its name? William Shakespeare in Stratford-upon-Avon. Yeah, yeah, I’m sure the poor old class heard them all.

While watching from Westminster’s studio, Mr. Hancock’s head began to grow. It wasn’t long until he was shaking her from side to side unpredictable. Whoop, cough, frosty imprint. He then wipes those eyes aggressively before reopening them in front of his fans.

Host Pierce Morgan said, “You’re very emotional about this.” There is always a little holiday in Percy’s heart when a guest cries tears of joy of joy. Reviews that you see. Retweet Abundance.

Meanwhile, colleague Susanna Reed seemed to be summoning all her powers to smother her noise. “It’s been just such a difficult year for a lot of people, you know,” Hancock stammered wearily.

His voice was now a high-pitched reed whistle.

While watching from the Westminster studio, Mr. Hancock’s head began to grow. It wasn’t long until he was shaking her from side to side unpredictable.

He indulged the pose of Brando Esk. Students of the Stanislavski Method will tell you that this is how it keeps the audience extremely anxious. Genius. By the way, this folk “you know?” Pure improvement.

“It has been a difficult year for a lot of people,” Hancock continued, before adding with a final embellishment: “A lot of work has been done on this, which makes you proud to be … British,” thundering applause. Go back. End roll credits.

By the way, peeping Hancock? Dear Sirs, They were so dry.

Fortunately, he had gathered himself in time to make his statement to the House of Commons several hours later.

Like any worthy sermon on Oscar night, Hancock still had many people to thank. Scientists, Volunteers, Public Health England. It’s a mercy that even the people who poured test tubes into Fairy washing-up liquid every night were not marked with special praise.

The first to congratulate Hancock was Health Committee Chair Jeremy Hunt.

Mister Hunt, dressed in woolen clothes, wanted to know when we could all have a nice, warm vacation. “It’s so cold outside!” I have complained.

I don’t know if Hancock intended to embarrass his predecessor, but he announced that he has already booked a modest rest in Cornwall.

Some Labor MPs were determined to spoil the mood. Meg Hillier (Lab, Hackney S & Shoreditch) has demanded reassurances that no company will benefit from launching the vaccine. groan.

Good Morning Britain hosts, Piers Morgan and Susanna, spoke to Matt Hancock Tuesday

Glum Miss Hillier isn’t much of a delight. Had she been at the collapse of the Berlin Wall, I fear she’d been complaining to Volkswagen Polizzi about all the noise.

Croser was still Naz Shah (Lab, Bradford), who accused the government of opening vaccine centers only in wealthy areas. Hancock coolly told her that those decisions were firmly in the hands of the NHS. Silence.

It’s funny how you’d be amazed at how quickly these three magic letters made the Labor MP mute.

There was a usual concern about these opponents of vaccination, especially on social media.

Labor’s John Ashworth said he had read some nonsense online claiming that the vaccine was a plot by MPs to alter our DNA. silly. I shouldn’t think that half of them can spell DNA let alone have the slightest idea what it is.

Damian Collins (Kuhn, Folkestone and Heath) suggested Hancock raise the matter with Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg.

In fact, Hancock replied, that he had recently had conversations with Zuckerberg’s head of communications, former Deputy Prime Minister Sir Nick Clegg (the famous salary of £ 1m a year).

Not to discourage Mr. Hancock’s day, but that note was the one for the file it was flagged: “Not very reassuring.”